Uncle Bob Stole My Shoes

Internet has, once again, been pretty bad and a fair bit of goings on have gone down - so, bear with me, this post is a chronologically reversed epic...

We've just left Antelope Park, a lion sanctuary in central Zimbabwe after an extended stay of five nights. The park is a game reserve on which the owners are attempting a radical breeding program to reintroduce entire lion prides to the wilderness. The program is entirely funded through tourist dollars spent on activities at the park and by private donations. Activities abound - horseback and elephant-back safaris, horse riding lessons, lion cub feeding and petting, lion walks, lion feeding, canoeing and fishing to name a few. It was an absolutely beautiful setting; we camped by a slow flowing river teaming with bird life, fish aplenty and the occasional elephant or four.

Our five night stay was longer than originally planned as it was revealed to us that our Ethiopian visas were no longer able to be issued anywhere except in our country of residence or upon arrival by air. We had expected to attain them in Harare. This meant that we had to courier our passports to Australia/UK/USA for processing, adding about six days to our stay in Zim. Other nationalities (namely German and Canadian) weren't so lucky and with no viable options are having to fly to Addis Ababa from Nairobi at their own expense. My cousin, Ben, has been brilliant in coordinating DHL's rapid turnaround. It's the second time on this trip that he's helped us out of a hole. A top bloke...for a Kiwi. All this good karma and the ABs might have a shot at beating the Wobblies later on this year. The upshot of this is that our trip is now due to finish on 28 August. So, instead of flying from Cairo on 26 August, as planned, we will fly from Tel Aviv on 5 September.

Back to Antelope Park...

Overall we had a relaxing stay but it wasn't without drama. Our first night I had a bad fever and blacked out while on a mission to the bathroom to have a spew. While Zoe went on our scheduled horse lesson/safari it was decided by the crew that I should be taken to hospital at Gweru where the initial diagnosis was suspected malaria. It had crossed my mind that I might have malaria but was more convinced of sunstroke or food poisoning. Sunstroke was ruled out but the malarial tests were inconclusive as high fever is required whilst blood was taken. Regardless, I was given a course of anti-malarials. Upon my return to the park I was confronted with the news that Zoe had fallen from a horse during a horseback safari and "broken her wrist". She was taken to hospital (while I passed out) where x-rays proved inconclusive as well.

Thankfully we were where we were and had time to recuperate. Zoe's wrist is still hurting but the swelling has gone down. It looks like there's no break (will be confirmed in Harare) and she's dealt with it much better than I would have. My fever abated within hours of the first course of anti-malarials.

Thankfully, also, it didn't stop us from completing the activities that we'd intended on doing. We spent some time with the elephants and their handlers, spent time with some lion cubs in the nursery and went on a two hour sunset bush walk with some tame and very lazy adolescent female lions. I eventually did my horse-riding lesson and horseback safari. The rest of the time we simply relaxed by the pool and ate.

Dawn at Antelope Park



Elephant training, Antelope Park

 

Feeding an Elephant, Antelope Park

Lion cub, Antelope Park

Zoe with cub and dodgy wrist, Antelope Park

Laura petting a cub, Antelope Park

Walking the lions, Antelope Park

Photo-op (they've just eaten so it's safe), Antelope Park

Sunset, Antelope Park

Zoe with schoolkids, Antelope Park

Prior to Antelope Park we were in Bulawayo for two nights. It was obvious that Bulawayo had once been a wealthy, proud and beautiful city with wide avenues and quaint colonial architecture. But more than any other part of Zim it has suffered badly in recent years; mainly due to the fact that it is the heartland of MDC activism and it relies on the agricultural output of people whose qualification for farm ownership is, apparently, their ability to terrorise others.

Fuel shortages, Bulawayo

While there, Zoe and I went with seven others in our group on a foot safari to track rhino. Secretly praying that we didn't encounter any black rhino, I was quite happy at the thought of seeing some of the white ones from a safe distance. After a morning of wandering around looking at some impressive San cave paintings in Matopo National Reserve, we met up with our tracking guides: Andy, armed with serious bushcraft knowledge, a straight talking personality and a .416 calibre bolt-action rifle, and Brendan, armed with a keen eye, an AK-47 and a seriously unserious attitude toward gun safety; swaggering through the bush holding it by the barrel, the butt swaying across his shoulder. Suddenly, the prospect of an unarmed encounter with a black rhino seemed not so bad.

San rock art, Matopo National Reserve

On patrol, Matopo National Reserve

Anyhow, Andy's tracking skills and Brendan's eagle eye came up trumps. After two hours, starting with a single footprint, we tracked down three of the "buggers", otherwise known as white rhinos, and stalked them closely for a couple of hours from about 30 yards. We also saw wildebeest, impala, baboon and warthogs. A great day. On the way back to Bulawayo Zoe rode in the front of the truck and chatted to Andy. He no longer had any family or old friends remaining in Zim. They'd all left for South Africa and Europe years earlier. Tough stuff.

A White Bugger, Matopo National Reserve

We arrived in Zim ten or so days ago from Botswana, crossing just a short drive from Victoria Falls. The boredom of waiting for Zimbabwean bureaucrats grant our visas was helped by monkeys entertaining us from the roof of the border post - and Lindy running in and out of the line in between puking up the previous night's intake of booze. The degraded state of Vic Falls township was stark both in comparison to Botswana and to descriptions given to us by friends who'd been there ten or more years ago. It's on the up again due to economic reforms but it was still very sad to see. Regardless, we still had a great time. We camped at Shoestrings Hostel - complete with pool, bar, hot showers and wifi!

The Falls, itself, was in full flow due to huge rainfalls in the upper Zambezi. The rumble of the torrents and the spray cloud could easily be heard and seen from the town. The day we visited Zoe made an effort to look presentable for photos; however, the sheer power of the Falls created so much spray that it was like walking through a car wash. Clothes stuck, make up ran. Plan foiled.

After drying off in the hot Zim sun we spent the afternoon at the posh colonial 'Victoria Falls Hotel' where Zoe finally met her match, in terms of cake consumption: their famous high tea - three tiers of sandwiches, scones and cream cakes. On the way home we were confronted by a herd of wild elephants wandering down the main street, to the amusement of locals and tourists alike. We also spotted elephant, monkey, baboon and warthog on an evening run and one of our group, Kat, literally ran into an elephant.

Prior to saturation, Victoria Falls



View from Vic Falls Hotel



Zoe's nemesis, Victoria Falls



The following day a group of ten of us crossed to Zambia to take a microlite flight over the falls and to visit Livingstone. The aircraft being two-seaters, Zoe and I flew separately. And being a gent, I let her go first. We had the same mad German pilot so followed the same general flight path, banking several times over the falls and canyon at about 500ft - swooping low over elephants and hippo pools on the banks of the Zambezi. He even let both of us fly for a short stint while he spoke of his faith in the "Power of God". There's nothing more reassuring than being the target of religious conversion whilst being suspended from a hairdryer-powered kite over Victoria Falls, let me tell you. Despite this and although Zoe found it "poo your pants scary", we both loved it.

Zoe taking off, Zambia

Time to hose the jumpsuit, Zambia

 

Me taking off, Zambia

The microlite flight was awesome; Livingstone less so. It looked like precisely nothing had been done since the Poms left, despite Zambia's incredible mineral wealth. Yet another paradise lost. Returning to Zim we were farewelled by Zambian hawkers telling us, sardonically, to say hi to 'Uncle Bob'; then swarmed by skinny Zim hawkers begging us to swap our shoes, water bottles, shirts, anything for their wares. Shoes are in massive shortage in Zim and the quality of shoes produced and available is very poor. I found out the hard way when my boots went missing from our tent on the last night of our stay at Vic Falls. For that, and the thorns in my feet, I lay the blame squarely on 'Uncle Bob' and his mates.